Where everybody knows your name
and they're always glad you came.
You wanna be where you can see,
the troubles are all the same.
you wanna be where everybody knows your name

You roll out of bed, mr. Coffee is dead, the morning's looking bright
And your shrink ran off to Europe, and didn't even write.

And your husband wants to be a girl!

Be glad there's one place in the world

Where everybody knows your name
and they're always glad you came.
You wanna go where people know,
people are all the same.
You wanna go where everybody knows your name.

[Repeat]
Where everybody knows your name.
And they're always glad you came.